On the 18th December one of my beloved cats, Ziggy, died of an embolism. It was very sudden and extremely stressful. We took him to the closest open vets, which was 30 minutes away, where the vets tried to stabilise him and told us the options. It was quite clear that Ziggy was in too much pain and struggling so hard to breathe that we had to make the heartbreaking decision to put him down. I think we did everything we could have and we, as a family, made the right decision for Ziggy. The day Ziggy went to the vets was horrible and so unexpected. I couldn’t understand that he had to be put down at first as it was all so very sudden, one minute he was fine and the next he really wasn’t fine at all. I felt sick and scared, he was a young cat and he shouldn’t be unwell. I couldn’t stop crying at one point I was so upset and a little confused. It felt as if there was nothing else and that it was just us, Ziggy and the vets. I simply wanted him to be better and to go home to carry on the day as normal. Nothing could really explain how you feel through this though. We took Ziggy’s body home with us and just spent time with him, it seemed the right thing to do. Mummy and Daddy had to make some arrangements for Ziggy though which seemed to be way too soon. They had been to Dignity before and knew there was nowhere else they would go. As it was almost Christmas they were a little concerned about being able to get an appointment.
We had the hard job of talking about what we would do for Ziggy and making a decision as to when we could take him to the crematorium. I personally found it extremely hard to let him go and wanted to keep him at home. I just had to be with him and stroke him. Dignity staff were very understanding and advised us all as to how many days we were able to have with Ziggy due to Christmas. We all spent time each day with him stroking, talking and sometimes crying. It wasn’t at all easy but he was still one of my gorgeous cats and belonged at home. When we got to the crematorium we went in with Ziggy on his bed and we met Katie who talked us through everything. She explained carefully and so kindly everything that we needed and wanted to know. She certainly understood how very sad we all felt. We were able to take some paw prints and gently took some fur clippings which was a very nice thing to do to remember him and his little toe beans. At first I was very nervous about him being cremated as I thought the idea of a ‘chamber’ was very scary and I didn’t want Ziggy to be alone. I was also scared that he would be taken in and burned with other animals as well. We were asked if we wanted to see inside of the chamber and Will reassured me that it was cleaned out properly beforehand. I could have as much time as I wanted with Ziggy and that really helped me. Afterwards we walked around the garden and then left for a couple of hours as we wanted to pick his ashes up on the same day.
When we returned Katie let me help put Ziggy’s ashes in tissue paper and we tied a ribbon with flowers to it then put him in a box with our other cats. Before we left there was a huge tree next to the car park with Christmas hearts and names on. Dignity had set this up in memory of peoples pets and were raising money for charity. We decided to get two hearts, one for their tree and one for ours with his name engraved and dates which is really cute. I still get really sad about Ziggy sometimes but it really is fine to be sad and my parents support me as Dignity did on the day. It is also absolutely fine to cry and to be happy and remember with a smile, there is no right and wrong to your feelings when losing a pet or someone you love. Each day is different and each day it is good to remember. I treasure the funny and cute moments I had with Ziggy and have some gorgeous photographs. I love talking about them with my family and cuddling Ziggy’s sister. We think she must miss him and she has become less aloof and spends much more time with all of us now. We feel that we need to give her more attention now and she had our love always but we just spend that extra time with her hoping that it will help any sadness that she has, it seems to be working well for all of us. Dignity is daunting when you go but when you arrive it is welcoming, loving and such a calm and good place to go. The staff there do understand how you feel and please do ask any questions that you need to as they will answer honestly and kindly. Watching a pet be carried to a chamber is your choice but I didn’t find it scary as I thought I would and Will and Katie explained everything. He asked if he could say a few words when he placed Ziggy in and the words were beautiful. We stood as a family with Will and Katie saying our sad goodbyes. For us going to Dignity was the right thing to do and gave us a chance to stay with our gorgeous cat. We want to thank everyone there for being so amazing especially Katie and Will.